It's Raining Outside So I'm Down

Wednesday I went to a 'southern living' demonstration party that my future sister-in-law hosted. Not that I'm against these kinds of gatherings but after two bridal showers, I have no other place for additional items in my home. So while I scoured the pages to try to find something (anything) to put on the order form, a woman in her early fifties struck up a conversation with me about being from Arizona. She lived most of her life there, still has a home there and many family members. Once she heard someone mention that I grew up there, she jumped at the chance to talk to me about the state she clearly still loves. I could see it in her face the way she still longs for it, but her husband's job brought her here to PA ten years ago and here she stays. I bring this up because I could tell that this might be me some day. Kinda scares me. At what point will I let go of the need to be near my family and focus on the new one I have with John?

The funniest part of these feelings I have is I was so tired of Arizona when I moved here. Just wanted to get going on something DIFFERENT. I swear it's this wedding damnet! Makes me miss my Mom and sister, makes me want to run over to my grandmother's house for breakfast. I've been planning the biggest day of my life to date virtually alone. I'll be so glad when it's here, everyone is together and I can go back to doing something else with my time here in PA so hopefully I can grow from it.